The Faith Life

The Butterfly that Was Two Butterflies

Tammy M CardwellLeave a comment
Blog cover featuring a Blue Morpho butterfly with closed camouflage wings and open iridescent blue wings beneath the title "The Butterfly That Was Two Butterflies."

“Tammy. Take a picture!”

The words were urgent, but also softly spoken.

I turned and saw a huge butterfly resting on my sister’s arm. It had mistaken her colorful tattooed cuff for a flower and, once it settled, was in no hurry to leave. In fact, it stayed on her long enough for pretty much everyone in our tour group to take pictures.

This specimen was both beautiful and fascinating. It seemed perfectly designed for camouflage. Its colors and the shape of its wings would have made it disappear completely up against a tree or leaf-strewn forest floor. And then there were the spots that looked very much like eyes; other animals could easily have mistaken it for a predator instead of prey.

I wondered if that was part of why it stayed so long. It instinctively knew it had nothing to fear. In a sense, it was hidden in plain sight.

It makes me think of us and how our lives are hidden with Christ in God. (Colossians 3:3) When we are right with God, we are in a sense wearing a type of spiritual camouflage. The devil may see us, but he also sees the One who watches over us. That knowledge can give us the same type of confidence that butterfly had.

We saw many beautiful butterflies at the butterfly conservatory that day, and we took our fair share of pictures. But there was one butterfly that proved most elusive. There were plenty of specimens there, but we only saw them in flight, and they seemed able to disappear without warning. We got only one picture, and it’s not the best.

Blue Morpho butterfly with iridescent blue wings displaying shifting shades of sapphire and teal.

Its wings flashed the most astonishing shades of blue, shades that changed as it moved. What you see here is a true representation of its coloring. The left wing wasn’t just in shadow and the right in the sun; its colors were literally shifting as it moved—which it did constantly.

I set my heart on following one until it landed for more than a split second so I could get a photo. After much wandering and a great deal of patience, I finally got my wish. One of these glorious creatures settled onto a branch right in front of me.

And suddenly I was laughing so I couldn’t have taken a photo if its wings had stayed open and still long enough.

Because, you see, the instant it landed it closed its wings.

And it was the very same butterfly that had landed on my sister’s arm.

Blue Morpho butterfly resting on a woman's hand with its wings closed, revealing brown camouflage and large owl-like eyespots.

There are so many spiritual lessons wrapped up in that one discovery that I hardly know where to begin.

When this Blue Morpho rested on my sister’s arm, it was the same brilliantly blue butterfly it had been only moments before. Nothing had changed. The blue hadn’t disappeared; it was simply hidden from view. Its beauty remained hidden until it took flight.

The science of this butterfly’s coloring is particularly fascinating. According to scientists, the blue isn’t pigment at all. Millions of microscopic structures on its wings reflect blue light and cancel out the other colors. That’s why this one was caught flashing from a deep sapphire in the left wing to a brilliant teal in the right.

Every detail of this butterfly speaks of an unimaginably creative Designer.

God took so much care to clothe this one butterfly in kingly colors at the same time He graced it with an almost perfect camouflage!

And why worry about your clothing?
Look at the lilies of the field and how they grow.
They don’t work or make their clothing,
yet Solomon in all his glory
was not dressed as beautifully as they are.
And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers
that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow,
he will certainly care for you.
Why do you have so little faith?

Matthew 6:28-30 NLT

And if God cares so wonderfully for the Blue Morpho…

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

When Ministry Leaves the Building

Tammy M Cardwell2 Comments
Pastor placing a comforting hand on a woman's shoulder during a football game, illustrating how ministry happens beyond the church building.

The game was on—fast and furious.
The crowd was cheering for family and friends.
And there I sat…
            sick, miserable, and wanting my bed.

I hid it to the best of my ability, but at some point my pastor walked by and asked if I were doing all right.

I lied.
I assured him I was.

A while later he passed by again, watching me, and asked if I were ok.
Yep. Lied again.
Call it speaking in faith if you want to, but I was flat out lying and we both knew it.

The third time, instead of passing me, he stopped. He put his hand on my shoulder, looked me in the eye, and asked something like, “Isn’t it great to be healed, whole, and serving God?!”

In that instant, I was healed, completely healed, and a joyful, “Yes!” came out of my mouth.

And he grinned and walked on.

I went from enduring that event to enjoying it because one man was ready in season and out of season—prepared to care for a member of his flock at a sporting event—and stubborn enough to keep coming back until I was ready to receive.

We’ve all heard the latter part of Mark 16:18 (KJV)
… they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover.

So we understand that God can heal people through the laying on of hands. That is exactly what happened here, even though I had no idea in those first few moments that this was precisely what his touch on my shoulder was all about.

We weren’t in church.
I didn’t go to an altar and ask for prayer.
He didn’t have me stand to be prayed for.
He didn’t ask someone else to join him to pray for me.
He didn’t pray for me at all, or not when he was around me.

We were very much in public, but this was a private interaction. Only the two of us had a clue what happened in that ten seconds, and neither of us mentioned it again…unless at some point I thought to tell him how much I had appreciated him listening to the Holy Spirit and continuing to reach out.

But I have never forgotten that day. More than once, I’ve cried as I remembered how my pastor, Pastor Ronnie, cared about me enough to go the extra mile. His seat was rows in front of mine. From a human perspective there was no reason for him to walk past me three separate times. But the Holy Spirit had given him a reason, a nudge; He must have. Pastor Ronnie saw a need, responded to God’s prompting, and didn’t give up on me before I was ready to receive.

And I, as a result, was not only healed in that moment, but learned the type of lesson that lasts a lifetime.

We are all called to minister this way,
ready when the Holy Spirit points out a need,
in season and out of season (2 Timothy 4:2 NLT).
Wherever. Whenever. However. And for however long.

As was true that day, ministry opportunities won’t always look like we might expect them to. They may require us to get out of line at the fast-food restaurant (That would be me!) or visit a hospital when hospitals are the last place on earth we want to be. They may mean reaching out to someone who despises us or risking a relationship by saying what a friend doesn’t want to hear. We must stay sensitive to the Holy Spirit so we don’t miss His promptings.

This is what ministry looks like after it leaves the building.

It usually won’t happen inside the church building.
The other person may not be ready to receive the first time we reach out. 
We may need to persist, even when it feels awkward or uncomfortable.

But when we get it right… oh, when we get it right as Pastor Ronnie did that day… the miracle may go far beyond meeting an immediate need. It may change a life forever.

Because when ministry leaves the building, lives are changed.

I know.

Mine was.

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

If God Isn’t His #1, He Doesn’t Qualify to Be My #2

Tammy M Cardwell2 Comments
Christian woman with an open Bible enjoying a peaceful sunrise, representing God-centered priorities and biblical dating standards.

I’ve been thinking about dating lately. Yes, about the possibility of me dating, but also about dating in general and what dating is and should be for the modern Christian.

What prompted this post?
I’m glad you asked.

A single friend told me that she’s had multiple presumably Christian men, some of whom she’s gone to church with for years, who at one point and another decided it was appropriate to slide into her DMs and invite her to their places for sex.

She’s not the first to tell me such stories. Another friend and I also had a conversation about having men who claim to be Christians fully expect her to go back home with them at the end of the evening.

This article isn’t going to be about sex.
I promise.

But in case you’re on the fence where sex and the Christian are concerned, let’s look at the Word for clarification.

Run from sexual sin!
No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does.
For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.
Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit,
who lives in you and was given to you by God?
You do not belong to yourself,
for God bought you with a high price.
So you must honor God with your body.
1 Corinthians 6:18-20 (NLT)

That’s about as clear as you can get, but here are a few more.
Hebrews 13:4
1 Thessalonians 4:3-5
Ephesians 5:3
Matthew 5:27-28

Like I said, it was the conversations about men claiming to be Christians while also encouraging women to sin that prompted me to write the article, but it’s not the point of the article.

In case you’re unfamiliar with my story, I spent decades married to an abusive narcissist who passed a few years ago. I’ve lived with the consequences of being married to a man who wasn’t on the same page I was, who clearly wasn’t right with God even though he was a declared Christian.

I have no intention of going there again.

I am, however, willing to marry again if that’s God’s plan for me, and He seems to be saying it is. So, dating with a purpose is now under serious consideration.

And I do mean dating with a purpose. I know people date all the time for many reasons, some good and some bad, but for me the only reason to date is to explore the potential for marriage.

With that in mind, I’ve put serious thought into what it would take for me to even accept a date. I told one friend that I was only open to potential matchmaking if he knew both of us well enough that he could assure me he felt we would be good together. Thankfully, he’s the type of man that totally gets it.

I work hard at becoming the type of woman who would be a true blessing to her husband. Primarily, I decided a long time ago that God is my number 1 and I intend to keep Him there. I expect nothing less from the man I marry. I even pray for him now, wherever he is, that God bless him, help him become who God wants him to be, and bring us together at the right time.

Am I interested in other things too? Yes, after being given the same advice by multiple people (including a man) to make a list of things I desire in my husband, I did. And I took it to God, trusting Him with it.

That’s the bottom line: God knows who I need and who needs me, and He is capable of bringing us together at the right time. So my job is to make myself ready and to be watching. Yes, to date, but to date for the right reasons and with my standards set.

My standards for dating are simple, and I’ve realized that I have not only the right, but the responsibility to make those standards clear from the beginning. My plan, should a man ask me out and I think maybe I want to accept, is to ask him two questions.

1. Are you a Christian?
2. Is God your #1?

If he can’t answer both questions with an honest and firm yes, then there’s no potential for a relationship and the answer is no, because we’re not walking the same road and I’m not leaving mine to join him on his.

If you’re thinking, “Hey, those questions might offend him!” you’re right, and if they do, he’s not for me. In fact, the man who is for me would be glad I asked and might have even considered asking me the same questions.

Here’s the deal.
If God isn’t his #1, he doesn’t qualify to be my #2.

Yes, I know there are men who could answer yes deceitfully or answer yes sincerely and later prove by their fruit that they were mistaken. The key is to watch for the fruit.

For instance, if like my one friend experienced, my dinner date were to invite me back to his home for sex, my answer would be something along the lines of, “Clearly you either lied or were wrong about your answer to my second question. So, yeah, there’s no potential for a relationship of any kind here.”

Child of God, I’m not telling you what to do… Wait, yes, I am. If you want to stay in right relationship with God, you have got to set aside the world’s standards. Parts of modern culture may imply that physical access is simply part of the evening, but we’re not called to live by that culture.

This same rule holds true where any temptation to sin is concerned.
If your date is tempting you to sin, it’s time to head out the door.

Modern culture demands instant gratification in pretty much all areas of life. The problem with instant gratification is that its benefits usually disappear just as fast. God’s rewards on the other hand, though we may not see all of them instantly, are eternal.

Make His standards your standards, and hold to those standards, and you won’t go wrong.

If God is truly first, His standards come first too.

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

PS: In case it’s not obvious, if God isn’t your #1 you’re really not ready to get married.

The Day I Put the Poison Down | Forgiveness, Anxiety, and Healing

Tammy M CardwellLeave a comment
Terry Naturally AnxioCalm samples on a wooden counter with the words “Choosing Forgiveness — The Day I Put the Poison Down”

Terry Naturally, a company whose Adrenaplex® is one of my daily supplements,
sent me these samples with my monthly subscription.

I’m not here to review the samples because I haven’t had to use them.

Which is exactly the point of this article.

As I was standing there, seeing them on the counter, I smiled specifically because I DON’T need them. Ever. At all.

This has not always been the case. Twice in my life with Jack I ended up spending a few months on antidepressants. Even when not on the antidepressants, I carried an anti anxiety medication with me for years. Because yes, I needed it.

I took a picture as I stood there specifically because these samples suddenly represented my deliverance from anxiety. And then I spent a few days thinking back, trying to decide when I was finally able to leave it all behind.

I still can’t remember exactly when I stopped using the anti-anxiety meds for anxiety (I found out they were a GREAT antihistamine and did occasionally use them for that for a while), but I believe I found the turning point.

I may be wrong, but I’m pretty sure it was the day I REALLY grasped the necessity of forgiveness. I’d worked on forgiving people for years, and honestly was pretty good at it. But it is admittedly hard to daily, even hourly, forgive a spouse who seems determined to break you. There came a day, though, when I finally, truly, understood that my unforgiveness was destroying me.

Read that again, carefully. MY unforgiveness—my refusal to truly forgive my husband—was destroying ME.

We’ve all heard it said that refusing to forgive someone is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. Like so many things, we can agree with the concept in theory while having a terrible time with practical application.

On THAT day I, for the first time, genuinely understood that the choice really was mine. If I were holding a cup of poison and could either drink it or not, the choice would be mine. And that was exactly where I was—holding a cup of poison that was killing me. I could either continue to drink it or I could choose to put it down.

I chose to put it down.

Right there, in that moment.

Over the next hour or so I honestly dealt with my unforgiveness against not only him, but a couple of other people I’d not even realized I was holding out against until God told me. This was deliberate action I took, something in my own heart that I chose to settle.

That decision changed everything.

Before, no matter how hard I tried, I often struggled to forgive Jack and failed. But something changed when I stopped committing to TRY and determined to DO.  When I catch myself feeling even a hint of unforgiveness, I squash it. I may battle it for a minute but I refuse to let it live in me.

And I am no longer being destroyed. If I remember correctly, that day actually came only a year or two before Jack passed away. I told someone not long ago that I can’t help but wonder if God didn’t let him live as long as he did specifically so I could reach this place.

That may sound ridiculous, but unforgiveness really is that destructive.

If you deal with anxiety, Terry Naturally’s new product may well help. But if you also struggle to forgive, I guarantee that learning to genuinely forgive will make a huge difference.

But you have to choose not just to try, but to do. And God is ready and waiting to help you do it!

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

I Gave God One Day… And Got More Done

Tammy M CardwellLeave a comment
Open Bible and coffee on a wooden table in soft sunlight representing Sabbath rest and peaceful reflection

What do you do when you hear God say,
“Start keeping Sunday as a rest day.”?

I knew it was God speaking, because the thought had never even crossed my mind. As an author and blogger with a full-time job, I’ve pretty much been working 7 days a week for years.

And God was asking me to give up a whole day?
Yes. Yes, He was.

But here’s the surprising thing: It’s been amazing!
I’m talking life changing amazing.
So much so that I had to share what I’ve been experiencing.

Interestingly, when I mentioned this to a friend, she told me God had recently given her the same instruction. As we compared notes, we realized we’re seeing many of the same results.

In “losing” that workday, setting Sunday afternoon and evening aside for rest, we’re both getting more done.

It’s easier to avoid putting things off when you know a full day is coming when you won’t be working. It’s also easier to stay focused when you realize your time is limited.

On Saturday evenings, even when I’m tired, I’ll push through to finish something I might have previously left for “tomorrow.” Because now tomorrow isn’t an option. And there’s something about knowing tomorrow isn’t an option that is very motivating.

In the past, if I took a day off just for me, I’d feel guilty about everything I wasn’t getting done. As a result, my “day of rest” was never truly restful.

Guilt can be exhausting.
There is no guilt on Sunday.

Once I get home from church, I am “off” in a very real way. I might toss in a load of laundry… maybe. But I don’t go near my laptop or anything that might pull me into work. The closest I come to working is talking to God. And even then, He’s been known to gently shut me down when my thoughts stray into “unrestful” territory.

Another unexpected result? I look forward to Mondays.

I’ve never hated Mondays, but there have been many when I felt the weekend was too short and I was too tired.

This doesn’t happen now.

When I head to bed on Saturday night, I’m satisfied. I’ve accomplished more than I expected, and I know a true day of rest of coming. After that rest, I’m ready to go again.

I’m less fatigued. Mentally, I feel better than I have in years. My patience is higher, even during one of the church’s busiest seasons. I’m not overwhelmed by everything on my plate.

This has been a complete shift.

Growing up, I had a friend whose family strictly observed the Sabbath. I even remember hearing her dad explain to mine, “You know I don’t do any work on Sunday.” At the time, I thought it a little odd even though I vaguely knew it was one of the Ten Commandments.

I mean, God did say in Exodus 20:9-10 (NLT):

You have six days each week for your ordinary work,
but the seventh day is a Sabbath day
of rest dedicated to the LORD your God.
On that day no one in your household may do any work…

I suppose I assumed it didn’t really apply to modern life—if I thought about it at all.

But it turns out that the need for a regular day of rest very much still applies.
And not just because God said so.

There’s a growing body of research suggesting our bodies are literally designed to function best with regular rest.

A regular rest day can:

  • reduce chronic stress (cortisol levels)
  • improve sleep quality
  • help prevent burnout and fatigue
  • allow physical systems to repair and reset

Without it, you don’t just get tired—you get worn down

On the other hand, when you truly step away one day each week, it can:

  • restore joy
  • increase patience
  • stabilize your mood
  • lift mental fog 
  • increase creativity
  • improve decision making
  • reduce irritability
  • dissipate anxiety

And that’s just a start.

You stop simply reacting and start thinking clearly again. You remember what matters, who matters, and why you’re doing what you’re doing.

And you remember Who’s really in control.
(That would be God.)

As a mostly-recovered control freak, I find that especially important.

It turns out God knew exactly what He was doing when He established the Sabbath.
And He knew exactly what He was doing when He told me to start keeping it.

God didn’t command us to rest to slow us down—He commanded it because He designed us to need it.

Have you ever considered setting aside a true Sabbath—one full day to rest with God?
You might be surprised what happens when you do.

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

The Hidden Meaning Behind “The Joy of the Lord is Your Strength”

Tammy M CardwellLeave a comment
Woman standing on a rock in a storm representing God’s protection and the joy found in His presence

“It’s good to see you like this,” she said. “It’s not normal for anyone to be happy all the time.”

I had thought she was my friend. Her delight in my pain—during what I’ve since recognized as a nervous breakdown—left me stunned.

The truth is that until that season of my life I had always been a happy person. Even though my husband’s behavior was becoming increasingly destructive, I walked in joy most of the time. All of that changed when God gave me a direct command…

and I told Him, “No.”

It wasn’t until recently—while reading The Force of Joy by Alexandria Flint—that I began to understand what had really happened.

We’ve all heard the phrase “the joy of the Lord is your strength” from Nehemiah 8:10. Nehemiah is encouraging Jerusalem’s inhabitants as they grieve over how they’ve sinned against God. He’s assuring them that there is hope.

Alexandria, in the very first pages of her book, digs into the Hebrew words that have been translated as “joy” and “strength.” And these words don’t mean what you probably think they mean!

Multiple Hebrew words are translated as joy in the Old Testament, but this word, chedvah, is special. It’s only used three times: In 1 Chronicles 16:27, Nehemiah 8:10, and Ezra 6:16. Unlike the other Hebrew words that refer to outward expressions of joy, Chedvah refers to the overflowing delight that comes only from being in God’s presence.

I love the way Alexandria explains it:

Think of it like this: chedvah is a deep root system buried in the richness of God’s character, and all those other expressions of joy (simchah, sasson, gil) are the flowers that bloom from that root. You can have beautiful flowers for a season, but if there’s no root system, the first storm that rages by will wipe them out.

The more I thought about chedvah, particularly in reference to that horrible season of my life, the more I understood why 1) I’d always been such a happy person and 2) I suddenly was not.

I’d always been happy because I intentionally lived close to God. I stayed in His presence through prayer, reading my Bible, worship… And being constantly in His presence—the very source of joy—I lived joyously.

But, on the day I refused to obey God’s clear and direct instructions regarding my involvement in a specific ministry, I did what we all instinctively do. I stepped back.

I couldn’t stay in His presence while choosing disobedience. The conviction would have been too much. I didn’t want to hear what He had to say… so I turned away.

I was no longer anchored in that flow of joy—and I was no longer protected by it. While living in God’s presence, with my focus on Him, I was able to handle my husband’s behavior, but suddenly I saw everything… every… little… thing that he did.

I couldn’t handle it.
And I started to spiral.

“The joy of the Lord is your strength.”

I had no strength, which is hardly surprising, but in losing that joy I lost more than strength. Much more!

The word translated as “strength” is ma’owz, and although it appears 37 times in the Old Testament this is the only place it appears as “strength.” In other locations, it’s translated as “stronghold,” “refuge,” “fortress,” and “protection.”

It’s a military term.

The joy of the Lord, that joy that comes from being in God’s presence, is your stronghold, your refuge, your fortress, and your protection!

That is what I stepped away from when I backed away from God!

I’ve spent days talking to God about this.

Think about Psalm 91 and all it promises to the one who dwells in the secret place of the Most High. When you grasp the truth of the joy of the Lord being your “strength,” this psalm becomes even more significant.

Even now, I’ve been literally sitting here with my head in my hands as I work to absorb all of this. And I’m reminded of a vision God gave me when our oldest was a baby.

At church, during worship, God showed me a woman
standing on a rock in the middle of a stormy sea.

Although her dress was wind-blown and waves beat against the rock, she stood confidently. God told me then that I could be that woman, one who could stand strong through any storm.

He didn’t tell me how to become that woman. He just told me to stay close to Him.

And, as it turns out, that is exactly what it takes.

As I live in God’s presence, I live in joy that can only be found in Him, and that joy protects me in ways I may never recognize.

And what about that friend, you ask? As I recall, we parted ways not long after. But I will say this; her heartless words were part of what woke me up. God used them to get my attention and draw me back to Him—back into obedience and back into His presence, His joy, and His protection.

There’s no place I’d rather be than in His presence, His joy, and His protection.

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

The Force of Joy: A Journey from Discovery to Deployment of Your Spiritual Weapon, by Alexandria Flint, is available on Amazon. I will publish a review once I finish, but I had to stop right now and share what I’ve learned just from pages 5-8.

The Devil Thought He’d Found the Perfect Weapon

Tammy M CardwellLeave a comment
Jesus seated on a cross holding keys, symbolizing victory over death and Satan, with golden light breaking through clouds

What was meant for destruction became the symbol of ultimate victory.

Satan’s plan looked genius. Don’t just kill the Son of God. Kill Him in the most brutal, agonizing, publicly humiliating way possible, branded as a criminal. Make a public spectacle of Him so that all who follow Him will be shamed and run for cover.

As far as the devil was concerned, there could be no better weapon than a Roman cross.

Except…

The devil knows the Word of God and knows it well. He’s been twisting it since the beginning as he’s tried to lead astray everyone he possibly can—including Jesus. (That attempt failed gloriously.)

But knowing the Word isn’t the same as understanding it. He missed a world of clues. Let’s take a look.

The Bronze Serpent — Lifted Up

The Lord told him, “Make a replica of a poisonous snake
and attach it to a pole.
All who are bitten will live if they simply look at it!
Numbers 21:8 (NLT)

Jesus directly connects this to Himself:

And as Moses lifted up the bronze snake
on a pole in the wilderness, so the Son of Man
must be lifted up, so that everyone who
believes in him will have eternal life.
John 3:14–15 (NLT)

This imagery? Being lifted up on a pole—that’s crucifixion. And Jesus told everyone it was going to happen.

Cursed Is Everyone Hung on a Tree

Anyone who is hung on a tree is under God’s curse.
Deuteronomy 21:22–23

Paul makes the connection explicit:

But Christ has rescued us from the curse
pronounced by the law. When he was hung on the cross,
he took upon himself the curse for our wrongdoing.
For it is written in the Scriptures,
“Cursed is everyone who is hung on a tree.”
Galatians 3:13 (NLT)

Jesus going to the Cross for us was all about taking the curse. He had to be hung on a tree in order to take our place.

Pierced Hands and Feet

…They have pierced my hands and feet.
Psalm 22:16 (NLT)

David wrote this psalm long before crucifixion like this was practiced. Beheading was more common in his day, and that doesn’t involve pierced hands and feet.

Public Exposure and Mocking

Everyone who sees me mocks me.
They sneer and shake their heads, saying,
“Is this the one who relies on the LORD?
Then let the LORD save him!
If the LORD loves him so much,
let the LORD rescue him!”
Psalm 22:7–8 (NLT)

Public ridicule was part of the plan, and the cross fit it perfectly.

Bones Not Broken

For the Lord protects the bones of the righteous;
not one of them is broken!
Psalm 34:20 (NLT)

This was fulfilled in:

When they came to Jesus,
they saw that he was already dead,
so they didn’t break his legs.
John 19:33 (NLT)

In Roman crucifixions, the criminals’ legs were often broken to speed death. But they did not break Jesus’ bones, and this connects to the Passover Lamb from Exodus 12:46 (NLT) where they were commanded, “…and do not break any of its bones.”

Jesus IS the Passover Lamb, the Final Sacrifice. (1 Corinthians 5:7)

Dividing Garments / Casting Lots

They divide my garments among themselves
and throw dice for my clothing.
Psalm 22:18 (NLT)

This is an oddly specific crucifixion detail that was fulfilled in John 19:23–24.

“Lifted Up” = The Means of Drawing All People

“And when I am lifted up from the earth,
I will draw everyone to myself.“
He said this to indicate how He was going to die.
John 12:32–33 (NLT)

He made it clear how he was going to die.

Yes, the Roman cross seemed to be the perfect weapon. But the devil was, as Shakespeare so elegantly put it, “Hoist with his own petard.” Satan’s plan blew up in his face—and Jesus was left holding all the keys.

And now the Cross is a beautiful thing, which brings me to the picture you see above. It’s an image that has lived as a concept in my head for a very long time, one in which our triumphant Savior uses what was meant to destroy Him as a place of rest—and a reminder of His ultimate victory.

It wasn’t just that Jesus had to die.
He had to be lifted up.

As my Resurrection Sunday gift to you, here are two versions of this image:

Download The Perfect Weapon Web Header

Download The Perfect Weapon Wallpaper

They are AI creations (Thank you ChatGPT), so I claim no copyright, but I would appreciate it if you would keep my watermark should you choose to use or share them.

Sunday is on the way!

And remember, Jesus is too. If you haven’t already, now is the time to accept Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior. He died so that you could truly live, and at some point in the (I believe) very near future He will return to catch us away to be with Him forever.

The other option—choosing Hell over Him—is unthinkable. Don’t go there.

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

The Dating App I Never Wanted… and What God Showed Me Through It

Tammy M Cardwell4 Comments
Woman sitting on a rock overlooking water at sunset, reflecting quietly

This piece is even more transparent than what I usually write, but sometimes it’s the things written in the trenches that God uses most. And, frankly, I felt God leaning on me to share. So let’s go.

After a few years of widowhood, I’ve reached the point where I’m seriously considering the possibility of getting married again. Getting here has taken time and many counseling sessions with God as my therapist.

He’s even told me I’m ready to meet someone, which is remarkable. Marriage to a narcissist leaves you carrying a lot of baggage that can be very hard to get rid of. It feels like it’s taken a piece of forever to get where I am today.

So, on a random day not long ago, God decided it was time to take a step.

He told me to set up a profile on a specific dating site.

His instructions made no sense to me. This dating app is so expensive there was no way—even for Him—that I would willingly consider that kind of commitment.

Judge me if you will, but I have an aversion to the whole idea of dating sites—for me. Still utterly confused by His insistence, I signed up for the free plan and determined to cautiously dip my toes in the water.

The extensive profile questions proved truly educational. They forced me to consider how I really feel about certain things. I had to ask myself, “Am I answering based on who I’ve always been, or who I’m becoming?”

But the real education came when I started getting matches. All I could do with the free site was look at their profiles, which I did. I rejected one after another, only “liking” one because I wanted to see what happened when you liked someone—and he was safely located several states away. Why was I rejecting these men? Honestly, for stupid reasons. Except… 

God called another counseling session in which He showed me just how much fear still hid in my heart, and it wasn’t fear of the men.

I wasn’t rejecting them; I was rejecting me.

Bottom Line: I was afraid of hurting someone. The thought of potentially holding someone else’s heart in my hand, not knowing if I had what it took to make him happy, doubting that I would be enough…

Frankly, it scared me—and I hadn’t even realized it until God made it clear.

I felt such shame. I’ve really thought I was trusting God completely where potential relationships are concerned. I have faith in God!

But, as He’s reminded me a few times through the years (because I need reminders), when I fail to have faith in myself, when I let that fear settle in, it affects my ability to trust Him. Fear pulls the rug out from under our faith, so we must seek it out and cast it away.

I repented of course; I’ve learned that much for sure! I started actively casting down those doubts when they arise and have renewed my commitment to trust Him without reservation.

If God wants me to get married again, He will bring the right man and we’ll be blessed. It’s inevitable. Never in my life has He failed me, and He won’t fail me now. And if I’m not meant to marry again? That’s cool too. I love the life I’m living.

Getting back to the counseling session, in the end God told me to cancel my membership, that the app had served its purpose. Being who I am, I asked Him to clarify what He meant.

His answer didn’t surprise me. He knew what was hidden in my heart and chose to use the dating app like a mirror so I could see it for myself.

Psalm 139:23–24 (NLT) says:

Search me, O God, and know my heart;
     test me and know my anxious thoughts.
Point out anything in me that offends you,
     and lead me along the path of everlasting life.

I want this. I pray this prayer with the psalmist because only when my heart is cleansed and my anxious thoughts are conquered can I truly stop doing things that offend Him. 

Walking the path God has laid out for me is vitally important to me. I never want to risk veering from it even a little bit, and certainly not because of anxious thoughts.

And the beautiful thing? God is always faithful to answer this prayer! When I’m not quite right, He lets me know.

It’s generally God’s own Word that He uses as a mirror, to help me see where I’m missing it. Honestly, this is one of the best reasons for reading the Bible; it has unique power to open our eyes to see things in ourselves we may prefer to ignore.

God also speaks to me personally, gently showing me where I’ve disappointed Him or when I could have behaved in a more godly way.

And then there are the surprising times, like this one, when He tells me to do something that seems utterly ridiculous or follow a path I find completely incomprehensible. I’ve learned to obey anyway, because I know He doesn’t do anything without a purpose.

In this case, that purpose wasn’t meeting someone.

It was revealing something.

God knew exactly what was hidden in my heart. He simply used the dating app as a mirror so I could see it too.

God will use the most unexpected things to help us see what’s hiding in our hearts.

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

PS: If you, too, are recovering from a narcissistic relationship, you are enough! Even if you’re carrying baggage like I have been, God can help you deal with it, unpack it, and kick it to the curb.

But Even If He Doesn’t: Faith That Refuses to Bow

Tammy M CardwellLeave a comment
Silhouette of three men standing before a fiery background with the words “But Even If He Doesn’t,” representing unwavering faith during trials.

Have you ever struggled with God after losing someone you love? Many have—especially when they’ve prayed, believed, and stood for healing. And yet, Scripture says something that often goes unnoticed.

Good people pass away;
the godly often die before their time.
But no one seems to care or wonder why.
No one seems to understand
that God is protecting them from the evil to come.
For those who follow godly paths
will rest in peace when they die.
Isaiah 57:1-2 (NLT, emphasis mine)

“No one seems to understand that God is protecting them from the evil to come.”

One day, the Holy Spirit lit up this verse for me. Given how evil the world has become since my mother passed, I’ve wondered if, in His mercy, He spared her from the horrific shift in culture that was coming.

Then there’s my husband, whose on-again-off-again relationship with God was “on” when he passed away. I believe God, in His kindness, let Jack go home at a time when his heart was right with Him.

These are my theories anyway.

But what about the rest of those who go before their time? I don’t know.

What I do know is that, while God can certainly handle our anger when we lose someone, being angry with God wounds our own hearts and strains our fellowship with Him. I’ve found a better way to handle the battles we fight, not just things like cancer and death, but everything. And that way requires being proactive.

The way the three Hebrew boys were proactive in Daniel 3:16-18 (NLT):

Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego replied, “O Nebuchadnezzar,
we do not need to defend ourselves before you.
If we are thrown into the blazing furnace,
the God whom we serve is able to save us.
He will rescue us from your power, Your Majesty.
But even if he doesn’t,
we want to make it clear to you, Your Majesty,
that we will never serve your gods
or worship the gold statue you have set up.”

Here, In Daniel 3, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego declared, “But even if He doesn’t…”

For years, these five words confused me. I’ve tried to watch what I say because I know our words have power—power for good and power for evil—and the last thing I want to do is empower the enemy. But I’ve realized something.

These words? They don’t empower the enemy at all. They strip him of his power.

Think about it.

But even if He doesn’t.

These three young men weren’t telling Nebuchadnezzar they doubted their God’s ability or willingness to save them. They were informing him that they would continue to serve their own God faithfully—unconditionally. There was zero chance that they would worship the king’s gods or bow before his idol.

Nebuchadnezzar had used the only threat he had, and it had proven worthless.

I assume you know this part of Israel’s history but if not, I encourage you to open the book of Daniel and read it—especially to see how their experience changed things for everyone. These three boys were, indeed, sent into the furnace. But instead of being incinerated like the soldiers that threw them in, these three were set free to hang out in the furnace with Jesus.

With Jesus.

When they finally came out, which didn’t happen until Nebuchadnezzar called them, they didn’t even smell of smoke.

But even if He doesn’t.

We can, and should, use these words in all our battles.

But even if He doesn’t heal our friend, we will not bow to you, Anger!
But even if our baby doesn’t make it, we will not bow to you, Doubt!
But even if we lose everything, we will not bow to you, Despair!

Devil, no matter what, you will not win!

When we choose ahead of time to hold fast to our faith in God no matter what, the situation may not seem to change, but we do.

  • Rather than being weakened victims, we become victorious warriors.
  • Instead of reacting to our situations, we hold our ground and actively fight the devil on a whole new level.
  • Even when we don’t get the answers we want, we stand strong.

Whatever we face, no matter how dire it is, having the attitude, “Our God is able, but even if He doesn’t…” puts the enemy on notice from the start.

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

Ten Minutes in Light of Forever

Tammy M CardwellLeave a comment

“When God gave me a revelation of forever,
of eternity, everything changed.”

After sending this message to a group of friends, I sat back and thanked God, for perhaps the thousandth time, for giving me a revelation of forever, for helping me grasp eternity. That moment of thankfulness led to a conversation about the difference between understanding and revelation.

You can have both.

We gain understanding in many ways— through study, through logic and reason… We gain understanding of God’s Word through spending time with it, meditating on it, digging into it, leaning on the Holy Spirit as our teacher…

Revelation is something different: It comes directly from God, and it bypasses the requirement for understanding. Where understanding acquaints you with truth, revelation confronts you with it.

One day at church camp I was in chapel listening to the minister and came to that moment. I’d heard enough about salvation that I knew the basics, but I didn’t really understand it. Nonetheless, in an instant the conviction settled in my soul.

Without a doubt, I knew I needed to be saved so I stepped into the aisle. It wasn’t an emotional thing; it was more a logical reaction to sudden knowledge. I didn’t even comprehend the magnitude of my decision until I saw my camp counselor crying.

Much later, I came to the realization that what I’d experienced was revelation knowledge. It was communication straight from God that convinced me of my need for salvation. I didn’t have to understand it. I didn’t even have to feel anything. I simply knew the truth, acted on the truth, and my life changed in an instant. There have been several times in my walk with God that He has given me such revelation and changed things instantly.

There have also been at least two times I specifically asked God for revelation on things I was desperate to comprehend. The first was the Rapture of the Church. Witnessing was hard for me and I felt that if I could just grasp the truth of the Rapture, and the reality of people missing it, I would be more driven to witness.

After a time, God gave me that revelation. And after the revelation, as I studied, I also gained understanding.

The same happened with forever. I’d had my blog “Eternally Planted” for years. The title is based off part of Ecclesiastes 3:11 in the NLT: “…He has planted eternity in the human heart…” Eternity is planted inside us even if we fail to recognize it. I think that’s why so many believe in reincarnation—because man has an instinctive knowledge that this life isn’t everything.

When I named my blog what I did, I had some understanding of forever, but at some point I realized I needed revelation. So I asked God for it. It didn’t come instantly, but one day God dropped it into my spirit in a way that lit up my world—and it changed everything about the way I saw my life.

I’d been married to my narcissistic husband for decades and was now responsible for keeping him alive and healthy, or as healthy as I could when he seemed intent on destroying his body. Every day was a struggle and my stress level stayed dangerously high. So this wasn’t a theoretical lesson. It came in the middle of a very real, very heavy season.

But then there was that day. In an instant, I suddenly had it. I knew in my innermost being that this life is nothing compared to the life I will have in eternity. That very hour, I told God that, if I had to live the rest of my life as I had been, it was ok. Because in light of eternity, this life is only ten minutes—and I can do anything for ten minutes.

Life didn’t get easier, but my focused changed. I was no longer looking at what was directly in front of me, but at what is waiting down the road. When you suddenly see a broad, beautiful vista ahead, walking becomes less frustrating and more of a challenge you’re willing to face.

We need understanding, obviously. But we also need revelation, and the beautiful thing is that God is ready and willing to give it. For me, it normally comes after He’s highlighted something I’m reading in the Word, after I’ve taken time to meditate on it, mull it over, and spend time talking to Him about it as I grow increasingly hungry for answers.

And sometimes I just ask.

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C